


The Running Call

by Nebulash



Series: The Running Call Verse [1]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Firefighter AU, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-06-27
Updated: 2014-07-16
Packaged: 2018-02-06 11:36:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 14,244
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1856652
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nebulash/pseuds/Nebulash
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After being rescued from his burning apartment building, Jean Kirschtein locates his savior, a firefighter named Marco Bodt, who is in the hospital after sustaining serious injuries during the rescue. </p><p>Firefighter!Marco & Civilian!Jean</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Awake

**Author's Note:**

> Alright folks, had this random fic idea last night and have decided to run with it. Whipped it up really quickly at work so forgive any mistakes. I shall proofread at home.  
> Shall be multi-chapter but not quite sure how long. Let me know how I'm doing and enjoy~

He wishes he could have remembered more if he was to be perfectly honest. After years of training for this exact situation, his heroic act, (that’s what people had been calling it at least) was nothing more than a faded dream bouncing off the back of his mind. He could remember the heat, the searing pain and the man in his arms as he leaped out of the building just in time - seconds before the floor above collapsed completely, but then everything as dark. Black and empty and he wasn’t sure if he should be thankful or upset for still being alive. You can practice and you can study and plan and prepare but nothing will ever make you ready for the actual situation. In the moment, the only thing you can depend on is your heart. Your adrenaline, your fear, the most human and primal of emotions. And if you’re lucky, they’ll be enough.

 

Marco Bodt was lucky. At least that’s what the doctors were telling him. There were a few of them crowding him now, checking his vitals and administering additional medicine he would need now he was awake. He was dazed. Their hustle and bustle a bit too much for his head to wrap around in his current condition, so he simply laid back and let them carry on. He started to survey the condition of his body, moving his fingers and toes and confirming he was still able to control most his body. Everything was there, besides the vision in his right eye, problematic...but he was still a bit too physically exhausted to worry too much. The pain he could remember was in his right side after all, of course that part of him would be damaged. He turned his head and tried to mentally stifle his hearing,  the Doctor’s words weren’t for his ears at the moment anyway. The terms and information escaping their lips were merely for each other, probably things he wouldn’t understand even if he tried. He wasn’t sure if he ever really wanted to know what they’d have to say anyway. Judging by what he had been through, it wouldn’t be good.

 

Marco turned his head to the side and allowed his vision to travel beyond the doctors and nurses, to the wall on the opposite side of the room, where a man with dusty blond hair sat looking more than concerned. Strange, he thought. He had no family in town and he was quite sure none his work friends would have the time to waste sitting at his bedside. Maybe he was a family member of one of the hospital staff or an intern out of scrubs.

 

The man’s long face was turned downward, his eyes focused hard on the floor, like he was listening to the conversation in the room but too afraid to comprehend it. He looked scared, Marco thought, and he wasn’t sure why but he wanted nothing more than to comfort this stranger. He had always been nurturing and kind, ever since he was young, and knew a profession where he could help people and save lives was the perfect choice for him. But he was devoted to his work and failed miserably at retaining a social life, which was why he found the strange visitor so particularly odd.

 

One of the doctors introduced herself, bringing him out of his daze. He brought his gaze to her, vision still a bit hazy now, although he could have swore he saw his visitor in perfect clarity. 3rd Degree burns and severe scarring, unlikely to regain vision in his right eye due to extreme nerve damage from his burns, things he had pondered but never believed would happen. But, she said, he was a hero. A simple consolation prize as far as he was concerned. He’d probably be out of work for ages thanks to recovery, and even then, without full vision he doubted he’d be allowed back out on the field. No depth perception meant a higher risk of an accident occurring while fighting a fire, and there was too little margin for error there.

 

The doctor’s words became garbled and he let his unbandaged-eye fall shut, prompting her to silence herself. She apologized, picking up his file and making sure everything he needed was in place. She commanded him to rest and explained that a nurse would come check on him periodically to make sure his healing process was going as planned. He simply listened, too exhausted and in pain to move. The drugs they had given him made him feel like he was dreaming. Perhaps he still was.

 

As the doctor turned her back, he turned to look at where his visitor had been sitting, only to find that he was gone. A pang of disappointment erupted in his chest. “Doctor Zoe?” He felt his voice come from somewhere beyond his body, like he had to reach so far inside of himself to finally speak after so long it wasn’t even his voice any more.. “Who was that man? Why was he here? No scrubs...couldn’t have been staff”

 

Doctor Zoe simply smiled, tucking her pen behind her ear “That was the man you saved Mr. Bodt. Rest up, and see you in a little while”

  


\---

 

_I’m an idiot, a fucking stupid idiot. Of course I shouldn’t have visited him yet. Poor son of a bitch wasn’t even awake. And now he’s seen me and now he knows I was there and I was too much of a fucking coward to thank him. Stupid idiot._

Jean was fuming at himself. Angry for not having enough strength to remain in the room after the doctors had left. He had heard the diagnosis, he had heard what his stupid pathetic excuse for a life had caused a decent human being to lose. And he was quite sure he had never entered such a state of self loathing before, which was truly saying something.

 

He whipped out his phone, angrily typing out a message to his best friend. He’d spent the last week on his couch, unable to find a better place to stay. With his apartment in ashes, he didn’t have room to be choosy.

J: On bus. Going to bar. Meet me?

 

E: How’d it go hrseface?  

 

Jean often didn’t understand how stupid Eren Jaeger responded so damn fast.

J: Like shit. I  ran. Couldn’t do it.

E: fuck, get your ass back there. Don’t be a pussy.

J: another time. he just woke up. Don’t want to be weird.

E: Be at bar in 10. Pussy.

 

Jean tucked his phone back into his jacket pocket and looked out the window. As much as he hated to admit it. Eren was right. He’d been a total fucking pussy to the person that had literally saved his life. Why couldn’t he just have stayed?

 

_Because you don’t want him to see the pathetic piece of crap he got hurt to save. You don’t want him to know that it wasn’t worth it._

 

When he got to the bar, Eren was sitting at a table for two with two pints ready. His best friend was incredibly annoying in a million different ways, but when it came down to him actually being there for Jean, there was little he could find fault with. “Horseface, drink up, but the next ten are on you. And I can’t be out for long. Mikasa is coming over and you know how she is about me drinking.” He shrugged his shoulders as Jean wrapped his hand around the cold glass, taking a nice big gulp.

“s’ Fine. Thanks for coming. Didn’t want to be near your couch any sooner than I had to. That piece of shit is uncomfortable.”

“And a pile of ashes would be better for ya? Fine with me.”

 

Jean sighed, drinking a bit faster. “You know I’m grateful”

“Yeah yeah whatever, what the hell happened? I’m sure it would have been okay. Probably better to get to him when he’s still all drugged up and loopy, then he won’t have to see how ugly you are.”

 

As Eren took a sip, proud of himself for his quip at Jean, the blonde reached forward and knocked the upturned glass with his hand, causing Eren to cough and the beer to spill. “Fuck!”

 

“I just panicked I guess. When I heard the doctors and the diagnosis. I just felt sick and had to leave. I’ll try again..It just wasn’t the right time”

 

“Whatever you have to tell yourself to make that conscience of yours shut up” Eren stated matter-of-factly as he wiped himself clean of beer with a napkin. “Get it over with, just say thank you. You know he deserves it. You were a goner had he not been there”

 

“I fucking know that, okay? It’s just not that easy”

“And hauling your fat ass out of a burning building was? Suck it the fuck up horseface. Drink yourself stupid and go back tomorrow. Or you can shove sleeping on the couch up your ass.”

Eren’s phone buzzed, prompting him to check it,“Shit, Mikasa is coming early”

He skillfully chugged his beer, slamming the empty glass down on the table when he had been drained of liquid. “Text me when you’re coming so I know to unlock the door, and grow a pair while your at it. Cheers.” Eren flicked Jean’s nose as he stood up from the table, giving the barkeep a salute as he walked through the door.

 

 _He’s such a fucking asshole_. Jean thought, but he was an asshole that was completely right about this situation. Stupid righteous Jaeger.

 

He downed his beer a bit too fast and ordered another before his common sense could kick in. It was early. Too early to be drinking, but he was a special case. After losing a good majority of his belongings as well as his home, he really couldn’t be fucked about societies norms for alcohol consumption.

He’d drink the afternoon away and hopefully manage to stumble his way back to Eren’s in one piece. Tomorrow would be a brand new day, and he hoped that this time, he’d muster up enough courage to do the right thing. 

 

 


	2. The Visitor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jean makes a poor decision with not-so-poor results.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all, sorry this took longer than I said it would. I got hooked on Game of Thrones and my writing muse suffered. Hope this continues to please you, and thanks a million for your support.  
> As always, please let me know what you think!

Jean wasn’t entirely sure how many drinks he had consumed by nightfall, but his stubbornness had gotten the best of him. He convinced himself that he was totally fine, and in the midst of his drunken stupor, decided to pay the hospital a visit.

He shambled down the street with his hands in his pockets, the buzz in the back of his head dimming how nervous he was about the situation as a whole. Deep down, he hated himself for not being able to do this sober, but wasn’t going to let this feigned air of confidence slip between his fingers. He could do it sober, he knew he could, but if he didn’t have to, all the more power to him, right? If he was cautious with his words, nobody would even have to know.

The hospital was only a short bus trip and walk away, and he made the journey in what felt like record time, despite his inebriated state. He took a short moment outside the hospital doors to sit down on a bench and compose himself just a bit. Walking in like a drunken hobo wasn’t going to get him visitors permission, especially to visit someone he didn’t even really know, so he used his better judgement and took a seat. It would probably be a good idea to let Eren know where he was, just in case, and to let him know that he’d probably be in pretty late.

J: at hsptial

J: Gonna do tje thng

E: Holy shit how drunk are you?

J: not drnk at all

E: Yeah fucking right Kirschtein, get your ass back here you are going to make a fool of yourself

J: Fck u jegar!

And that was all the encouragement he needed to slide the phone into his pocket, and continuing inside. He’d prove Eren wrong alright. He wouldn’t make a fool of himself - he had perfect control. He walked through the automatic doors and into the lobby, making his way over to the receptionist’s desk.

“I’m here to visit Marco Bodt” He said confidently, his words rolling off his tongue slightly slurred. The receptionist looked at him sceptically as he slid his ID onto the desk in front of her.

“Have you been drinking sir?”

_Shit_

“No, no of course not.” Jean stood up a bit straighter, wracking his brain for an excuse. “Just, had a long, strenuous day at work. Tired..and..yeah ”

The receptionists’ scrutinizing gaze didn’t let up, but her hand moved to the computer, typing in Jean’s information from his ID and printing him out a temporary visitors pass.

“You have an hour, visitation hours stop at 10. If I hear you’ve caused trouble, you’ll be barred from visiting any patients again. Am I clear? We get drunks in here all the time. People can’t handle when a loved one is sick so they drink their troubles away. But that isn’t good for anyone.”

_Jesus christ, Debbie downer._ “Crystal clear” Jean took the pass between his fingers and peeled off the backing, sticking it onto the front of his chest.

He knew the way to Marco’s room already, navigating the halls with somewhat calm ease. Every step brought him a bit closer to the sole reason he was still alive, though the calm buzz in the back of his head managed to keep the nervous butterflies in his stomach at bay. This would be over as quickly as it had started, he thought. _Just a quick thank you and chat with the brave soul who wasted his time and self on you, and then you can konk out on Jaeger’s couch and sleep straight on through your hangover._

Jean turned the handle on the door to Marco’s room and took a step inside.

\--

Marco awoke a few hours later without much recollection of when he fell asleep. He chalked it up to the medicine he was on and laid there patiently. Dr. Zoe had said someone would be in to check on him later, though he wasn’t sure how far away “later” would be. He laid there in silence for a moment, watching the rhythmic beat of this heart in the form of a wave on the screen. It was strange, that the only difference between life and death were those tiny persistent peaks displayed on a computer screen. How trivial it all seemed right now.

The doctor’s diagnosis hadn’t been that horrible, yet it would still be crippling to his beloved career. Something he had spent years training for and loved very much. The scars that would undoubtedly cover a large percentage of his body would probably scare any romantic suitors away, not that he had many to begin with, and he would have to learn how to deal with his limited vision in his day to day life. Saving another’s life had been worth it of course, but for the first time in his life Marco Bodt really wished the flames had swallowed him up instead. Being spit out half a person just didn’t seem fair.

A sound at the door snapped Marco out of his thoughts. Must be the nurse he thought. He turned his head slowly, still a little dizzy from the medicine and injury, expecting to see a hospital staff member, only to be met by another site entirely. His visitor was back. His hair was a bit more ruffled and his cheeks flushed, probably from exposure to the chilly weather outside. He looked a bit tired but Marco could see pure determination in his eyes. He was interesting, to say the least with his hands in his pockets and two toned hair and his eyes that weren’t quite brown but weren’t quite hazel either, narrow and focused.

Stepping into the room, Jean was immediately faced with his saviors gaze which was almost enough to make him run for it right then and there. He resisted the urge to jump. “Shit! I mean…crap, I mean…” He rubbed at the bridge of his nose in frustration, collecting himself. “ I hope I didn’t wake you” Way to go Jean, first impression was going nice and smoothly so far. His voice seemed loud in the quiet room and it echoed against the cold hospital walls. Keep it cool Jean, don’t be weird.

“Do I look that bad?” Marco said a little quietly, still unable to muster up his voice to it’s usual strength. He managed a smile. His visitor, the man he had saved, according to Doctor Zoe, had come back to see him.

Jean shuffled away from the door, a bit unsteadily, making sure it was shut before standing a bit awkwardly in the center of the room, his hands still tucked in his pockets. He felt safe like that, drawn in on himself. “No! No…not at all sorry I’m just…” Jean sighed, trying to put his words together in his head once again. “I’m Jean Kirschtein…and you sort of saved my life. I mean…you did save my life and-” The careful speech he had written and recited over and over in his head since he had watched the paramedics load Marco, who had just been a nameless firefighter at the time,  into the back of the ambulance was slowly falling to pieces bit by bit. Nerves or alcohol, he wasn’t sure of the cause, but this was a goddamn mess.

“I know. I saw you earlier. Why’d you leave?” Marco made a small effort to sit up, but a quick jolt of pain reminded him of his injuries. He held back a wince, not wanting to look weak in front of his visitor.

Jean tried not to grimace as the pain showed on Marco’s face despite his efforts to hide it. _That’s your fault. It’s your fault he’s hurt. You should be lying in that bed, not him. But here you are, drunk and standing in the middle of his hospital room_. “Sorry I guess I just freaked…Lots of doctors saying words way too big for my brain. Figured coming back later and getting you to myself might be better.”

Marco let out a soft little laugh, “Wanted me to yourself? I’m not very much fun…just woke up actually, but it wasn’t you. Woke up a bit before you arrived actually. Seems like we both have good timing.” He managed another smile. Jean seemed rather sweet so far. He was obviously troubled by this encounter and Marco couldn’t blame him. He’d be nervous in his shoes and commended his bravery to visit. Jean had come to see him, twice now, despite the difficult circumstances and Marco was rather touched. “You should sit. Pull up a chair. Looking a bit uneasy on your feet there soldier.”

Jean blushed, his cheeks already slightly flushed from the alcohol. Shit he totally knows I’m drunk, “Yeah I might have stopped off at the bar on my way here. But don’t tell the lady at the front desk yeah? She was totally on my ass about it.” He grabbed one of the chairs that was lined neatly against the wall and scooted it over to Marco’s bedside, plopping down into it once it was in place. Jean’s words had urged another small chuckle out of Marco. This wasn’t so bad.

“Your secret is safe with me. Thanks for coming back. I’m sorry you go overwhelmed earlier, I would have probably gotten the heck out of here too if I was able to.. It’s nice to see you…alive and well. Sometimes rescues go in vain, It’s nice to see this one didn’t”

Jean nodded slowly, looking into the warm brown eye that wasn’t wrapped behind bandages. Part of his cheek was visible as well, exposing the freckles that decorated his skin.. Even with the bandages, Jean could see that his face was full of kindness. Of course it was, he thought, he risked his life for your stupid ass. “Yeah they gave me oxygen and stuff after they took you away, but I was pretty much fine after that...Don’t thank me, I don’t deserve that at all. I actually came here to thank you. I’d be nothing but a pile of ash right now if you hadn’t been there. I’m just…I’m really sorry you got so hurt.” He hoped Marco could sense his genuinity. He wasn’t sure if it was the alcohol helping him admit how he felt, or if the warmth Marco naturally emitted was helping his cause as well. It wasn’t as hard as he thought, confessing his appreciation and concernt. “I just wanted to wish you well…for what it’s worth. Show you that I was okay. The guy I’m staying with said it’d be a good idea.”

“It was a good idea. It’s good to see you. Honestly. I wish it was under better circumstances but..here -” Marco offers Jean his unbandaged left hand. “I’m Marco Bodt…it’s nice to officially meet you. You look a lot better when you’re not covered in soot and ash”

Jean took Marco’s hand and shook it carefully not wanting to jostle him, “Nice to meet you too. And I’m sure you’ll look a lot better when you’re not covered in bandages.”

“Ah we’ll see about that. Guess you’ll have to visit again when I’m doing a bit better and find out.”

“Guess so. Would that be alright? I mean...sort of expected you to hate me. You’re there, I’m here. Doesn’t really seem fair.”

“You sort of sign away the idea of fair when you dedicate your life to saving people. My duty was to save you, so I did. I’d never hate you for that.”

Jean was left speechless, unsure of what to say to something so earnest and kind, so he simply nodded. “You’re a better person than I’ll ever be, Marco Bodt.”

It was then that a nurse popped her head into the room, and Jean wished for a short moment that he could pick up the chair and chuck it at her. This was his precious time with Marco. Medical things could wait. He’d been saved by this lovely person whose company was actually extremely pleasant, and Jean just wanted more.. “Sorry to interrupt, but visitation hours are over now, and We’ll need to give you a quick check up before bed Mr. Bodt. I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

Marco looked at the nurse and gave a slight nod before returning his gaze to Jean. How strange, that this man had walked into his life and made him feel so at ease - Made him forget about the severity of his wounds and the possibility of being unable to continue his job. He’d never met someone that had been able to take him away from his problems like that, and for it to be the man whose life he had saved, of all people. Fate sure did work in mysterious ways.

Standing up, Jean reached for Marco’s left hand and gave another gentle shake. “I guess that’s my cue. Mr. Bodt. You get some rest yeah? I’m about to go do the same. If my friend’s couch will let me.”

That earned him a smile from Marco, “I’m sure you’re busy but, if you get the chance, feel free to stop by again. Company is nice and I don’t get much of it and we didn’t really get to talk all that much. You’ll be okay getting home right?”

“Oh yeah, don’t worry about me. Best drunk stumbler in the city. I’ll stop by tomorrow, just so you don’t worry.”

“Perfect. I’ll look forward to it. No drinks beforehand next time though, okay? Unless you’re going to sneak me some in, too. Thanks again for coming here Jean.”

“Yeah, well…thanks again for pulling me out of that building, Marco.” He turned on his heel, giving Marco a quick wave before slipping of the door, down the hall and into the brisk night air.

_I hope you’ll find me worth it._


	3. Absent

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Just give him a day or two, don’t lose hope. If you have enough faith to charge into a burning building to rescue someone, have enough faith that they’ll return to your side, okay?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Double update today. I got this written at work like the naughty little thing I am ; o ; Just a bit of character building and back story stuff in this one, as well as a bit more info on Marco's injuries. I know you guys are probably dying for some Jeanmarco stuffs but just be patient :) you'll get your wish soon, I promise.

After Jean had left, Marco had patiently allowed the nurse to survey him, counting the speckles on the ceiling tiles as she changed the dressing of his wounds. He’d be lying if he said it didn’t hurt. Even with medication, his burns were incredibly severe and were still a bit too painfully new. He let his eyes fall shut and found himself thinking of Jean. The other man had been so different, so strange. He wasn’t at all like any of his friends at the station, or most of the people he acquainted himself with at all. Jean was a bit more harsh, a bit more real. Marco had grown up in a relatively happy family home in the suburbs, nobody had ever seemed as legitimately human as Jean had to him the previous night.

He honestly hoped Jean would stick to his word and visit him again, even if it was just for an hour or so. There were still so many questions he wanted to ask the other man, what he did for a living, why he hadn’t evacuated the building like he was supposed to, What did he like to do on the weekends? Was he was in a relationship?  
It was there that he stopped himself. Why should he care about that? He had just met the guy for crying out loud, he wasn’t that starved for attention, was he? 

Marco fell asleep with Jean on his brain, unable to shut his mind up as he fell into a relatively peaceful slumber. Tomorrow would be a new day, his burns would continue to heal and hopefully he’d be given another chance to talk to the strange man he had rescued.

 

Meanwhile, Jean had bused back to Eren’s place and immediately fallen asleep on the couch, a bit more drunk than he had perhaps given himself credit for. Eren had understood, throwing a blanket over him and making sure he was on his side. He’d ask him about what had happened in the morning and hoped Jean wasn’t scheduled to work. He’d most likely have a hangover, and grumpy hungover Jean was never fun to deal with. 

 

Hours later, Jean awoke with a start, his phone blaring a god-awful ring tone he had assigned for the sole purpose of it being god-awful. It was the only retched sound that could grab his attention. He answered quickly, wanting to shut he noise up and tried to sound as awake as possible. He hadn’t checked the time but assumed it was probably pretty late in the day based on the way the light was streaming through the curtains. 

His mother’s voice boomed through the speaker, too loud and a bit frantic, “Jean sweetie, the bakery is absolutely swamped today. I’ve got 5 huge orders. Think you could come in?” Her tone was one he knew too well, that asking but demanding at the same time sort of tone she had used on him since he was little. Jean liked his job helping his Mom run her bakery, but today was just not a good time.

Jean flinched a bit, his mother’s voice exacerbating the pounding in his head. He weighed out his options:   
help his mom with a banging fucking hangover, miss visitation hours completely, fail Marco, and probably die.   
Or say no to his mom and definitely die via poisoned laced cake she would probably force him to eat.   
“Jean are you listening?”  
“Yeah Mom, yeah... I’ll come in. Just give me like...an hour and I’ll be there.”  
“Good boy, that’s my son. See you soon, and pick up some eggs on the way. We’re running low and I have about 200 more cupcakes to churn out by lunchtime.” 

The call ended with a beep and Jean rolled onto his back with a huff. He hadn’t been smart enough last night to get the number to Marco’s hospital room and he definitely didn’t have time to drop by again. Marco would be waiting for him when visitation hours rolled round, and he wouldn’t show up. Instead, he’d be up to his eyeballs in flour and annoying customers with more money than sense. Jean groaned, pulling the blankets up to his chin. Not only did he feel like absolute shit, but he was going to disappoint the closest possible thing he’d had to a friend in years. 

Rolling out of bed, he made his way to the shower. This was going to be one hell of a day. 

 

\---

 

The sun was starting to set and Marco still hadn’t seen any sign of Jean. The nurse had put the TV on for him and urged him to relax but he wasn’t really sure if that was possible. Why was he already so disappointed that Jean hadn’t come back? It wasn’t all that surprising, Jean had come and said his thanks, he was probably just being nice when he offered to visit again. With his thank you’s said Marco probably wouldn’t see him again, and for some stupid reason, that hurt. 

Time continued to slowly tick on by but it seemed like no time at all before his nurse, Petra her name was, walked in. Her light red shoulder length hair was pulled back into a lose ponytail and she looked a bit too happy to be walking from patient to patient and dealing with their various issues. She took Marco’s file from it’s pocket by the door and made her way over to his bed. “No visitors tonight huh? I really hate having to kick people out.” 

Marco smiled a bit sadly, “No, not tonight I guess. I’m sure they hate being kicked out just as much.” He wondered if Jean would have stayed a bit longer if he hadn’t been forced to leave. He mentally scolded himself for getting so attached already. They hardly even knew each other, it was stupid of him to be this upset.

“I’m sure they do.” Petra efficiently checked Marco’s vitals, making little notes on his file before she began to unwrap his bandages again. “You’re healing pretty nicely, Doctor Zoe will be so pleased. She was so excited to have you under her care you know. What you did was very brave.” 

Petra was sweet, but Marco just wanted to be left alone. If he couldn’t have Jean’s company, he didn’t want anyone’s, especially if it meant having his bandages changed. “Mhmm” He said a bit coldly, “whatever gets me out of here as quickly as possible.”

The nurse bit her lip, nodding, she was used to dealing with grumpy patients, but nothing Marco had been prescribed should illicit such side-effect in him, she knew it must have been something else. “He’ll be back you know. They always come back. I’ve seen some patients really torn up when a certain someone didn’t show up during visitor hours, but there’s almost always a very valid reason. I’m sure he’ll be back soon.”

Marco’s eyes widened a bit. Of course Petra would have seen a variety of patients in different situations, he wasn’t the first to be upset over this. He simply nodded, counting the speckles on the ceiling tiles again as she worked away. “he was just different. I’ve never met someone like him before...and he’s the person I saved...All of this is for him...I want to talk to him again.” 

Petra smiled sweetly, carefully brushing Marco’s bangs out of the way and skillfully re-bandaging the burns on his face. “Then he has all the more reason to return. Just give him a day or two, don’t lose hope. If you have enough faith to charge into a burning building to rescue someone, have enough faith that they’ll return to your side, okay?” 

The firefighter nodded, managing a smile. “Yeah, okay. Thanks a lot...that actually makes me feel a lot better.”

“I specialize in that you know, helping people feel better? All a part of the job.” She smiled again as she finished her work. “Try and get some rest. Tomorrow Dr. Zoe wants to see how well you can walk. It’ll be a good way to monitor your progress so it should be a good step down the road to recovery” 

She seemed excited. Marco, however, was not. As he had dragged Jean out of the building, his team mates been waiting outside, ready to pull Jean to safety. Marco didn’t find himself so lucky, and as the building collapsed under the great stress of the flames the right side of his body had been pinned inside. The damage done to his right arm and leg had been extremely severe. Not only was he badly burned from the fire, but both his arm and his leg as well as a few ribs had been fractured in a few different places. He’d need corrective surgery eventually, but with his burns so intense, they would have to wait a while before he was well enough to handle an operation. 

The doctors had told him it was very possible he might never walk completely normally again. Physical therapy and practice could make the situation better, but with injuries so severe, it just wasn’t likely. He had tried a few times, to move his leg or bend his knee experimentally, only to be met with a searing pain. There was no way he could walk, and the longer he went off of his feet, the harder it was going to be to get back on them. What good was a firefighter, even one that wasn’t allowed in direct action, if he was unable to even walk?

Marco had hoped he’d have at least a few weeks of recovery before they’d start his physical therapy sessions, but it looked like the hard truth was coming had him faster than he’d like. 

___

 

After an absolutely hectic day at his mother’s bakery, Jean was more than ready to order a giant takeaway pizza for Eren and himself and vegetate far away from humanity for the next ten years, but things didn’t usually go the way Jean wanted. His mother had offered to make him dinner, something he could never say no to. He loved his mom with all his heart and her cooking was the best in the world. 

I’ll make enough for two, and you can take some to that nice firefighter who saved you. How lucky you were Jean, I don’t know what I would have done.” He was pretty sure his mother had no idea that “nice firefighter” was still in the hospital with severe burns and multiple broken bones, but he decided not to let her know that small detail. She’d end up cooking 1000 meals and make Jean hand deliver them each day for the rest of his life, and though seeing Marco every day didn’t sound so bad, he didn’t really want to deal with his mom any more than he had to. 

“Yeah yeah, whatever Mom. I was supposed to go visit him today but I sort of got tied up with the bakery. Can I have tomorrow off? I’ll work for the next two weeks straight if that makes it better. I just don’t want to let him down again.”

“Oh dear, I’m sorry about that. I just really needed you and I didn’t realize. You can take him the food and a few cupcakes if you’d like. Whichever one’s you’d like.” 

Jean nodded, tucking into his meal. The idea of taking Marco his mother’s cooking was slightly strange. It seemed so personal, and it made his heart feel warm in his chest, “That’s actually not a bad idea..thanks mom.” He took his last bite and stood, taking his plate to the kitchen.

His mother lived in a one bedroom apartment above her bakery. She had started the business when Jean had been 10, shortly following his parents divorce. Jean had always despised his father and hadn’t minded moving into the tiny apartment with his mother. He honestly probably would have lived on the street if it meant being away from his father, so he made the best of his situation. His mother embarrassed him and he often got bullied at school for working in a bakery, something his bullies harassed him for being “gay and girly” but he didn’t mind. He loved his mother more than anything, and enjoyed helping her make her dream come true. She deserved it after what she had been through.

Jean would have moved back in with her instead of sleeping on Eren’s couch, but after tasting freedom for so long, he wasn’t really too thrilled about sharing a living space with his sometimes overbearing mother. Working for her was quite enough.   
“Thanks for dinner Mom, I should get going. It’s getting late and Eren waits up for me.”   
Mrs. Kirschtein nodded, moving into the kitchen to pack him up some leftovers and a few of his favorite flavor of cupcakes, baked fresh that day. They were meant for Marco, but Jean wasn’t sure they’d allow him to eat outside food in the hospital, he’d probably have to give them to Eren instead. Or eat them himself. He liked the latter option quite a bit better.

“Take tomorrow off, I’ll call you if you’re needed but we should be fine with the staff we have.. I’m sure you could use some rest.” She kissed his cheek, earning a grunt of disapproval.

 

“Thanks again Mom, I’ll be in touch.”


	4. The Crutch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jean was here and Jean was his crutch and that was all he needed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took a lot longer than expected. This chapter is quite important and I wanted to make sure everything fell in place before posting. We're finally getting somewhere! <3 Enjoy, and thank you so much for reading!

Jean very much liked to think he knew a lot about a lot of things, but he was the first to admit he knew absolutely shit all when it came to flowers. He had left Eren’s apartment in the middle of the day after enjoying a sleepy morning laying in and headed straight to the local flower shop after getting dressed. Was it weird to buy a guy he hardly met flowers? Probably, but Jean was feeling increasingly guilty for not only causing Marco to be burned and broken on the majority of his body, but also standing him up and leaving him hanging the day prior.. He hoped the other man would understand, it really hadn't been his fault, and his family would always be an important part of his life, even when other responsibilities arose. Jean definitely didn’t have anything to lose.

 

Now here he was, standing in the middle of a flower shop, looking completely clueless. He had gotten his mom flowers for Mother’s day, and often for her birthday as well, but that usually just required a trip to the local grocery store and picking out the first bouquet he saw. He wanted this to be more special, more unique, and more earnest in a way. Jean was completely useless at putting the right words together, so his actions were really the  best way for him to communicate himself to the outside world.

 

“Can I help you sir?” a young woman’s voice brought him out of his daze. He turned his head to find out where the voice had come from, a petite blonde girl with blue eyes stood behind the counter, a pink apron tied around her waist and an unfinished arrangement sitting on the counter in front of her.

“Oh uh, I guess so yeah.” She simply smiled and nodded in response, slipping out through a small swinging door and moving over to him. He looked down to meet her gaze, noting the name etched into the nametag pinned to her apron, Christa.

 

“Who are you buying flowers today sir? Is there any sort of special occasion? That’s usually a good place to start.”

Jean immediately wracked his brain or an adequate explanation for his situation. “Well...I have someone that’s probably pretty disappointed in me, and I’d like to just say I’m sorry? I don’t know him all that well...so I don’t want anything super personal or..romantic I guess, it’s not like that.” Christa nodded in understanding and Jean appreciated her silence as she perused her flower collection for something appropriate.

  
  


She walked over to a small bucket where a bunch of white tulips sat tied together in water, she untied them and picked out a few of the ones she deemed most beautiful before making her way over to another bucket, “white tulips are symbolic of forgiveness, and these, hyacinth, symbolizes sincerity as well as forgiveness.” Christa selected a bunch of the prettiest purple hyacinth and brought them to her nose, smiling sweetly,”And they smell lovely.”

 

Jean watched her and listened, nodding in understanding as he spoke. He couldn’t help but smile softly at her honest demeanor, it was obvious that she loved what she did and it led him to  wonder if Marco loved being a firefighter as much as Christa liked dealing with her flowers.  “Those are perfect, thank you, that seriously helps so much, I didn’t have the slightest clue.”

 

“That’s what I’m here for!” She giggled softly, carrying the bouquet behind the counter to cut and arrange them. She skillfully clipped off the end of the stems and organized them neatly into a gorgeous bouquet before wrapping them in a few layers of tissue paper and finishing her work with thin white ribbon.

 

Jean took out his wallet and paid for his gift, feeling much more confident about the whole ordeal now. With these flowers Marco would have to forgive him, right? They were perfect.

 

Christa took Jean’s money and gave him a bright smile as she handed the bouquet over to him, “I hope your person forgives you, if not, don’t give up. Friendships can be hard sometimes but you shouldn’t give up on someone that means something to you.” Her eyes flickered over to another person in the store that Jean hadn’t even noticed. Re-stocking the flowers was a tall woman with shoulder length brown hair, tied back into a ponytail. She turned for a moment to look at Christa, freckled cheeks blushing slightly before her eyes moved to Jean. She shot him a quick glare and turned back to resume her work. The small blonde just smiled apologetically at Jean, “Come back soon, okay?”

 

He nodded, thanking her once again for her help before turning on his heel, exiting the store and making his way to the hospital.

  
  


Marco woke up with a feeling he was in for a rough day. He really hadn’t been able to sleep well after Nurse Petra had finished changing the dressing on his wounds and had laid awake in bed for quite a few hours before he eventually succumbed to sleep. The problem wasn’t an obvious one, there were plenty of issues for him to worry about at the moment, but one simply stuck out in his mind. Jean. Why the other man had affected him so deeply was a mystery, but Marco could definitely say, without a doubt, that he had been the one to rescue Jean for a reason. He tucked into the breakfast that had been brought in for him and continued to let his mind wander. Being in the hospital gave him way too much time to think, something he probably didn’t need to be doing at the moment. His body was resting, but his mind was not.

 

He wasn’t a religious person whatsoever, or even a spiritual one at that, he had seen too many difficult and terrible things while on the job to believe in a higher being that was just. Terrible car accidents, homes burned to ashes, family members in utter devastation at the destruction of everything they held dear. The fire station was often the first to respond to 911 calls, so his unit would often be the first ones on a scene. After a while, seeing so many terrible things made you numb to the idea of a god, or higher being in general. How could someone create a world to let it be filled with such sadness? But, when he had seen Jean that morning, when the doctors had been swarming him, he definitely felt like they had met before and that they were meant to meet again. Was it fate, or just his mind playing tricks with him, Marco wasn’t sure - but he certainly wanted to know why he felt so comfortable with the other man.

 

He mentally reprimanded himself for thinking such stupid things, but even still, he was unable to extinguish the feeling of familiarity that had entered his chest upon seeing the man he had saved. Maybe it was the drugs, maybe he was just finding strange ways to cope with his injuries and inevitable future handicap, maybe he’d never see Jean again and this was all for nothing anyway.

 

Doctor Zoe snapped him out of his thoughts, her cheerful demeanor a bit too much for him, especially this early in the morning. “Hello there~ Hope you enjoyed your breakfast. The food isn’t amazing here but it isn’t totally awful, right?” She laughed, grabbing Marco’s file out of the pocket by the door as Petra did every night. “So I’m sure you remember that we’d like to go ahead and start physical therapy today. I know it seems early, but you’ve been here for almost a week and a half now and I think it’s time we try to get you moving. Even if it’s just the smallest of steps. It’s not good for your body to be stationary for so long, and your burns have healed enough to be safe to walk on.”

 

Marco listened but didn’t agree. Deep down, he hoped that it would be quite a while before he was forced to attempt to walk. The other doctors hadn’t been as enthusiastic about physical therapy so soon, but Doctor Zoe seemed to know what she was doing. Marco had hoped he’d be able to stay in bed for a little while longer. The potential of not being able to walk properly scared him, and although this therapy was a way to make sure he could in-fact walk again, he wasn’t ready for the hardship yet. No time was a good time, but today in particular, he still found himself affected by Jean’s absence yesterday. He felt like an idiot, but that’s just how his brain was currently working.

 

“Could we maybe...I don’t know, not do this today? I’m not feeling very positive, and I don’t think that would have a good effect.” He stated simply. Hoping i would be enough.

 

“Why put off until tomorrow what can be done today? Time is of the essence Mr. Bodt, and if you want to get back on your feet, you need to do as I say. The physical therapists have studied and trained in this area for years, they’re not going to let anything bad happen.”

 

Marcos sighed, there was no way he was going to get out of this, that much was fairly obvious. He liked Dr. Zoe, he really did. She was different, nothing like the other doctors in the ward and certainly nothing like any medical personnel he had met in the past.

 

Petra entered the room wheeling a wheelchair and together with Doctor Zoe, they sat Marco into it and pushed him out of the room. “What if someone tries to visit me while I’m out of my room?”

 

“The receptionist will let them know.” Petra chimed in as they made their way through the hospital halls. “ We’re not supposed to have visitors in the physical therapy area, just to make the patients as comfortable as possible. A lot of them get nervous at the potential to disappoint their loved ones if they can’t complete the exercises.”

 

Marco didn’t respond, it wasn’t the answer that he wanted to hear, but he liked Petra and didn’t want to cause her trouble. When they arrived in the physical therapy room, a man with light blonde hair and rather broad shoulders met them at the door.

 

“You must be Marco Bodt. I’m Reiner Braun, head of physical therapy. What you did out there was amazing, It’s an honor to be able to help you recover.” The man offered Marco his hand which Marco shook confidently. Petra smiled softly at the two, “I’m going to go take care of some things while you’re in here, good luck Marco.” She gently squeezed his uninjured shoulder and headed out of the room, leaving Marco with Dr. Zoe and Reiner.

 

“We’re just going to stretch out your legs a bit first. You’ve been out of commission for a while and we want to make sure you don’t hurt yourself more with physical action.” Dr. Zoe explained and Reiner nodded in agreeance. For someone so muscular, his movements were controlled and careful as he gently took Marco’s leg and stretched it out. It was slightly uncomfortable, but Reiner was quick to make adjustments to the procedure if he noticed that Marco was in pain.

 

They continued like so for a while, Reiner moving Marco’s sore muscles while Dr. Zoe took notes, and Marco became unusually comfortable with the two of them. It wasn’t until Reiner stopped and stepped away from him that the familiar pang of anxiety filled his chest again. “You should be ready to take a few steps now, I’ll help you stand and take you to the wall” he pointed to bare wall with nothing but a metal railing attached. “If you need help, just say so, I’ll be right behind you.”

Marco huffed quietly, not ready for this at all. He liked Reiner so far, but didn’t want to depend on him. He was embarrassed. Slightly ashamed. Children needed help walking, not grown men that were once in peak physical condition and a promising career.

 

The physical therapist pushed him to the wall and helped him stand, arms strong around his shoulders. It was already hard, just standing on his injured leg, and he felt the anxiety grow in the pit of his stomach as Reiner’s grip loosened around him and he was left completely alone. His knuckles were bone white as he clung to the railing and panic filled his chest, he took a few deep breaths to calm himself and tried to listen to Dr. Zoe’s words as she called out to him from across the room, but her voice was nothing but a muffled echo in his ears.

  
  


Jean walked into the hospital, checking in with the receptionist quickly and heading to Marco’s room, bouquet in hand. When he arrived, he was quite disappointed to find Marco’s room completely empty. If Marco had been released, and Jean was quite sure there was no possibility of that having happened, the receptionist would have told him right? He took a flustered step backwards, running right into someone. Turning on his heel quickly, he aimed to see the offending subject. A small nurse with light red hair stood in front of him, looking quite perturbed.

“Shit sorry miss. You don’t happen to know where I could find Marco Bodt could you?”

 

Petra immediately smiled, folding her arms and stepping a comfortable distance away from Jean. This was the guy that had let Marco down yesterday, the guy he had saved from the burning building that night. “I could. But I’m not supposed to let any unauthorized person back to where he is.” She stated with authority, “But, if you tell me where you were yesterday, maybe I’ll consider taking you there. If your excuse is good enough.” Petra wasn’t one for breaking rules, but she had a pretty strong inkling that Marco wasn’t having the best time at physical therapy at the moment. Maybe this fellow that Marco had seemed to miss could help more than any of the medical staff could.

 

Jean couldn’t help but give the nurse an odd look. Had Marco told her? Maybe she was just perceptive...a good nurse should be after all, right? “Well, my Mom runs a bakery a few miles from here. She called me in to work and I couldn’t really say no. I felt like shit...honestly.”

Petra studied Jean’s face carefully. As far as she could tell, he seemed sincere. “Are those for him?” she nodded towards the flowers.

 

The blonde felt a heat rush to his cheeks, as usual, his immediate retort ended up laced with sarcasm “Uh, no, they’re for the bitch of a receptionist who seems to think I’m constantly drunk and up to no good... Yes of course they’re for him. Now please let me see him. If his nurse knows II stood him up, he must have been pretty upset about it.”

 

The nurse sighed, gesturing for Jean to join her as she walked out of the room and down the hall, “Yeah, he wasn’t happy about it. But I told him you’d have a good reason. I didn’t want to be wrong so, I wanted to ask you why you skipped out first. You passed. The receptionist told me you were here so I thought I’d come catch you first, before someone else got to you and made you leave. “

 

Jean simply followed the nurse down the hallway, holding Marco’s flowers a bit more tightly than he probably should. He was thankful that Petra had found him, otherwise he might have been forced to leave and Jean didn’t like to be forced to do anything. He could picture it now, calling stupid Jaeger and having to ask him to bail him out for assaulting security at Marco’s hospital. Just the idea of the situation made Jean cringe. He pushed those idiotic thoughts out of his mind. This wasn’t time to think about stupid things like that. Petra was taking him to Marco, and he was going to be able to make this right.

 

“Take your time, even one step is progress. Don’t be afraid Marco.” Jean could hear a woman’s voice through the door.

“He’ll be in here. They’re trying to get him to take a few steps. But he’s not going to be able to walk properly for a while with those injuries like they are. If he stays put too long, the healthy muscle will grow weak, so it’s important that we keep him moving. He’s not too happy about it at all so..be supportive. I think seeing you is what he needs right now.” She smiled softly and placed a hand on his shoulder, the other gently relieving jean of his flowers, “give me these, I’ll put them in a vase in his room so you can give them to him when he gets back in there.” And with that, she was on her way back down the hallway they had come from and off to check her other patients pausing only briefly to turn around one more time, “Jean? Find me later, I’ll give you the number to his room so you can call next time. I won’t have my patients be left in the dark” Jean nodded. He wasn’t going to argue with that.

 

The handle squeaked softly as he opened the door, peeking inside.

 

Marco froze. When the door had opened he had stopped moving entirely. He really didn’t want anyone seeing him like this beside Reiner and Doctor Zoe, but he found himself letting out a sigh of relief when his eyes met Jean’s. He clung even more tightly to the safety bar screwed to the wall, palms hot against the cool metal, unable to take his eyes from his visitor. “Jean? What are you doing here?...where were you yesterday?”

 

“Visitors aren’t allowed in here, I’m afraid you’ll have to wait outside.”Reiner stated softly, trying to do his duty. “No no,” Doctor Zoe’s answered before Jean could say a few choice words of his own. Who the hell did this guy think he was?  “He can stay, he’s a friend of Mr. Bodt’s, isn’t that right? Maybe he can help!”

 

With that Jean snapped at attention.  Help Marco? Hell yeah he could.  If there was anything that could be done to make things up to Marco, he’d be all for it. His eyes locked on Marco’s again, voice coming out much more softly as he spoke. “I got caught up with work, I’ll explain later just...how can I help right now?” He turned to Doctor Zoe, “What can I do?”

 

“Well, Marco?” Marco’s eyes hadn’t left Jean, his brain validating Jean’s excuse and deciding to forgive him almost instantly. One time could slide...Jean was here now, and that’s what mattered. There were bigger problems to worry about, like the large space between him and Dr. Zoe that she wanted him to cover. Maybe not today, but sometime and it honestly might as well have been a mile long.

The fireman swallowed hard, voice trapped in his throat for just a moment before he spoke, eyes moving from Jean to a spot on the floor “Would you maybe, help me walk a bit? I mean...just...hold onto me. I’m afraid that...I’ll fall.” His voice came out much quieter, as if he had only wanted Jean to hear. “And I don’t want help from anyone but you.”

 

Jean’s heart was in his throat, seeing Marco so vulnerable. This was the same man that had risked his life to pull him from a burning building, and now here he was, afraid to take a few steps. “If that’s what you’re afraid of then, I won’t let that happen.” Jean closed the distance between them and carefully wrapped an arm around Marco’s waist, keeping him stable and holding him upright as Marco carefully pushed away from the wall, balancing on his good leg. He was warm, and Jean could feel the muscles in his stomach and hip flex as he gained his balance. “Okay..” he breathed out softly.

 

“Yeah, you’re okay, you can do this, just a few steps, that all it needs to be.” Jean’s thumb rubbed encouraging circles into the other’s lower back, “ I won’t let you fall.”

Marco took a deep breath and pushed forward with his injured leg, letting out a short hiss of pain as his foot settled onto the ground and he began to transfer his weight. Jean hated that. Hated that noise and wanted nothing more than to carry Marco back to his room and get him comfortable in bed, but he knew he was doing what was necessary.

 

With Jean supporting him and taking a bit of the weight off his leg, he was able to swing the uninjured limb forward, in one triumphant step. Doctor Zoe let out a whoop of excitement from the other side of the room, “excellent boys! A few more and I think we’ll be done for the day. You can go back to your room and relax.” But Marco could only see Jean, Marco could only hear Jean’s quiet words of encouragement muttered under his breath, so only he could hear. - feel the way Jean held him, firm and gentle and with so much care. The way the smile had broken out on his face in a fit of sheer happiness as Marco had completed his first step. But most of all - at the way Jean had shown up, just in time, to save him. Guess the tables had turned.

 

He’d lean on Jean, for what it was worth. He had leaned on Jean the first time they had met, using him as an anchor to his positivity, he had leaned on him yesterday and even though he had failed to show, the idea of Jean had  helped Marco carry on. The friendship that was developing between them was just an added bonus, but for now, Jean was here and Jean was his crutch and that was all he needed.

 

With a few more shaky but very possible steps, Jean helped Marco back into his wheelchair with ease and was given permission by Doctor Zoe, who was practically beaming with pride and excitement for her patient, to take Marco back to his room for visitation time. He rolled the wheelchair down the hall, maybe a bit too fast. Earning a few gasps of unsuspecting nurses and technicians and a few hysterical fits of laughter from Marco, who hadn’t stopped smiling since they had finished therapy. This was so nice, so easy, Jean thought. How easy it had been to hold Marco, to encourage Marco. It was strange how fast his heart had beat, how much he had wanted Marco to succeed in that moment, how much that smile. That confident, radiant, sweet smile, had set the butterflies in his tummy to flight. Through the bandages, and the slight expression of pain Jean could tell Marco was fighting, Marco was still, so ridiculously charming. And Jean hadn’t felt more at home and at peace in ages.


	5. A Misunderstanding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Marco gets a new visitor, Jean gets the wrong idea.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey folks! Sorry this took a while, I've been focusing on writing longer chapters and updating a bit less frequently! It's been working out better so far. Thank you to all of those that have been reading/commending/leaving kudos, you guys really help keep me going! 
> 
> A few new characters make their appearance in this chapter. I know one is sort of an OC, but she's a very special part of my girlfriend Ali and I's jeanmarco rps and we love her very dearly. I hope you like her, too! 
> 
> Also, apologies for the slow build of their relationship so far, I'm a sucker for long, drawn out conflicted feelings and emotions that eventually turn into love

With Petra’s help, Jean got Marco back onto his hospital bed, sheets nice and freshly changed thanks to the nurse, who was now in deep conversation with Doctor Zoe. Jean listened for a moment, wondering what they had to say about Marco’s achievements but quickly realized he was eavesdropping on a personal conversation. He turned away from them, returning his focus to Marco who was, with great difficulty, attempting to prop himself up with the rock-hard hospital pillows.

“Hey hey, what are you doing? Let me.” The blonde made short work of the task, easily propping the other man up and smiling triumphantly. He made a quick mental note to try and see if there were any more comfortable pillows available. Jean wanted Marco to be as comfortable as possible.

Had it been anyone else, Marco would have been offended. He liked doing things for himself and hated being waited on hand and foot, but with Jean, he was touched by acts of affection. Jean knew absolutely nothing about him, yet here he was propping him up with pillows and smiling one heck of a charming smile at him. He tried to stop himself before he got too attached. Surely, once he was out of hospital, Jean would return to the life he lived before they had met and things would go back to normal. Whatever normal was now.

It wasn’t until he got settled and comfortable that he saw the gorgeous bouquet of flowers arranged sweetly in a vase next to the television. His eyes went a bit wide, “Where did those come from?”

Jean turned around to see what the other was talking about. There sat his flowers, hand chosen by the store owner herself just for their situation, he smiled fondly. Petra had done a lovely job of arranging them in the vase she had retrieved, he was happy she had taken them from him.

Jean cleared his throat, “Oh well, there was this jerk you see? He was supposed to visit you yesterday, but he got tied up with something and let you down. He dropped them off earlier to try and make it up for you. Total idiot.”

Marco’s eye flicked from the flowers and up to meet Jean’s honey-colored ones, “a jerk huh?.” he paused for a moment, attempting to put his words in order, “yesterday I would have probably agreed with you. I was so mad, for no reason either. You hardly know me, it infuriated me that lacking the company of a complete stranger bothered me so much. “

Jean smiled down at the man, hand reaching up to softly remove a few strands of hair that had begun to stick to the bandages, “ You were mad because I made a promise that I didn’t keep, and that isn’t fair, not when you’re here like this...because of me.”

Marco looked up at Jean, slightly wishing he could see with his other eye, he wanted to see Jean completely, not with partial vision. He felt a bit uncomfortable at Jean’s blame for his injuries. Of course had Jean not been in the building, he wouldn’t have gotten hurt, but there was absolutely no way he could blame the other man for what had happened. Jean’s life was just as  important if not more so than his. It was a human life that would have been extinguished had Marco not taken action, and for that it was worth it. Even had Jean never come back, Marco wouldn’t have regretted saving his life. In a way, he signed over his life when he had committed to his career as a firefighter. Every single one of his fellow firefighters  had done the same, their task to help people and save lives put them in danger’s grip more often than not, but it was just another part of the job.

”That’s not why you’re here is it? Because you feel guilty?.” Maybe that’s what all this was about. Maybe deep down, Jean cared nothing for him whatsoever and just felt that he was doing his duty.

Jean sighed softly, why was he here? Originally, yes, it was because he had felt guilty for the injuries Marco had sustained, but he could tell that if that was the answer he gaved Marco, the other man wouldn’t have been too happy about it. And it would be a lie. While at first, Jean had shown up merely out of guilt and a gripping need to thank the person that saved his life, he had come back for Marco himself, not for the situation.

“No.” Jean shook his head, taking the time to put his words together, “I think...it’s pretty impossible for me to not feel slightly guilty, and I’m sure you can forgive me for that. but.” He swallowed hard, looking around the room to find that Petra and Doctor Zoe had left them on their own, “I came back because I wanted to see you.” He’d leave it at that, he thought. It was vague enough to not sound creepy, yet held a lot more truth than Jean was ready to out rightly admit.

Marco watched Jean as he put thought about what to say, his jaw clenched thoughtfully and the muscles of his neck moved as he swallowed. He was handsome, Marco couldn’t deny that. His two-toned hair fell messily over his forehead where his brow furrowed in concentration. He couldn’t help but be slightly captivated, curious as to what Jean was going to say.

“Lots of people want to see me, to check my injuries, to change my bandages or check my blood work. I wouldn’t miss them if they didn’t show. What makes you so different?” Marco felt his voice come from somewhere deep inside of him. He needed to know, he really did. He needed Jean to help him through this - to give him something to work towards, he just wasn’t sure to what extent he’d need Jean. Friendship was enough for now he supposed.

A bit taken aback, Jean turned his gaze away from Marco. He was right, Marco had people in an out of his room all day. His gaze stayed on the flowers as he spoke, a bit afraid to look Marco in the eye at the moment, “I..I’m not here to see your injuries, I’m not here for your burns and broken bones. I’m here for the person suffering from them. A person named Marco suffering through those injuries for me.” He turns back to Marco now, hand gently brushing a few more stray strands of dark hair out of the firefighter’s chocolate brown eye.

Marco’s stomach did a small flip at Jean’s words, “I’m not suffering through them for you, I’m suffering through them for me, so that I can know I did everything in my power that night to make sure you were safe.” His eye stared right into Jean’s “You’re here now, and so am I. I succeeded. Don’t hold that guilt when even I don’t hold you at fault. I was doing my job. Yesterday you were doing yours.”

Jean felt his heart grow a bit lighter at Marco’s words. No guilt, no blame, he could maybe get there one day, and though he couldn’t turn his guilt off with a switch, with Marco’s words still echoing in his head, he felt like one day he could forgive himself.

“Can we maybe...start over? You know...Just...augh, here.” He gently took Marco’s hand in both of his own, shaking as carefully as possible as to not hurt the other, “Jean Kirschstein, I work at a bakery, I’m living with my friend because my apartment went up in flames, you saved my life and I’d very much like a friend.”

The firefighter couldn’t help but smile. Jean’s hands were warm around his as he looked up at the other, the brightest smile he’d had in ages gracing his lips. “Marco Bodt, Firefighter, currently a bit worse for wear but… You are worth every burn and broken bone...I’d love to be your friend.”

 

_You are worth every burn and broken bone_

 

Works that echoed soothingly through Jean’s mind as he fell asleep that night.

 

\----

Marco woke up feeling refreshed and ready to begin his day. He had said goodnight to Jean shortly after their oath to friendship and had fallen asleep not too long after. His injuries were easily on the mend now, and with the steps he had taken earlier, Doctor Zoe seemed quite hopeful that Marco would be able to walk out of the hospital when he was ready. The typical morning routine went by without a hitch, Petra coming in to check on his bandages and administer the medicine, which had decreased in dose daily. He didn’t miss the hazy cloud it seemed to cast over him, and was thankful that the pain in his body has subsided enough to go without. Breakfast passed, Lunch as well, and then there was a knock on his door.

It wasn’t like the nurses or doctors to knock, or Jean for that matter, they all came in and out as they pleased, “It’s open, come on it.” He called from his spot on the bed, and the door opened. A small face peeked out from behind it, her apprehension visible in her eyes. As soon as she saw Marco on the other side, her eyes lit up and she bound across the room with joy, “Marco!!”

“Molly? What are you doing here? Where’s mom and dad.?” Marco hadn’t seen his little sister since well before his accident. His parents lived about an hour out of the downtown area and didn’t often make the trip in to visit. Marco would occasionally be able to stop by his old home on his days off, but the drive was long in city traffic and although he missed Molly dearly, he just didn’t have the time.

“They had some things to do in the city so they dropped me off.”

She stood by his bed and waited patiently as he rearranged himself, providing a spot for her to join him there. Molly hopped up happily, only slightly worried about the bandages covering the majority of her brother’s body, “These, “ she gestured to the bandage covering the side of Marco’s face, “These will make you better, right? That’s why they’re on you?”  

The firefighter smiled a bit sadly, nodding, “Yes, they’ll make me all better with the Doctor’s help. I’ve already come a long way.”

“Mommy and Daddy said you shouldn’t have gone into something so dangerous. They say this is what you get.”

Marco felt slightly sick, a wave of nausea washing over him as his little sister spoke. It wasn’t her fault, he knew that, but words are never as honest as they are when they are spoken by a child, and the truth was painful. He knew that his parents were never overly fond of the idea of their son risking his life for others. They wanted nothing more than for him to take a quiet office job and live in quiet, boring bliss until his hair turned grey. He reached up, gently tucking some of Molly’s thick dark brown hair behind her ear, “And what do you think, little Molly? Do you believe them?”

“No, I don’t. I think that..” She sat sideways on the bed, showing her back to Marco, an invitation he understood as her quietly asking for him to play with her hair, something he had done often when they had lived under the same roof. He turned slowly, positioning himself and separating her hair into three parts, preparing to braid it. His bandaged hand made it a bit difficult, but nothing was ever too hard for Molly. “I think my big brother is very brave,” she continued, “ I tell everyone at school..Marco saves people! Marco is the best, Better than you!”

He laughed softly, leaning a bit closer to press a kiss to the top of her head, “That’s not a very nice thing to say. I’m sure the kids at school are very nice. Maybe one day, they’ll grow up and save people too.”

“Mmmaybe. She said absentmindedly, enjoying having her hair done by her favorite (and only) big brother, “they’ll never be as brave as you.”

“Thank you Molly,” he kissed her head again, “But as long as they’re brave when it’s needed most, that’s all that really matters.”

  
\----

  
Jean once again earned approval from his mother to take the afternoon off to visit Marco. He had informed her of everything that had been going on, right down to helping Marco walk. It was hard to keep things from his Mother, and she was starting to take notice of her son’s random day dreaming and unfamiliar little streak of positivity. She knew something was up, especially after everything he had recently been through  and whatever it was, she didn’t want to keep Jean from something that obviously made him very happy.

When he stopped at the reception area to check in and get his visitor’s badge, the receptionist already had a badge printed for him. She handed it to him over the counter with a sly smile, icy blue eyes giving him a slightly scrutinizing glance, but with a small hint of indifference, like she was sizing him up but didn’t care what she saw. “Marco’s got another visitor besides you today. Play nice Jean Kirschtein.”

Jean raised an eyebrow, removing the backing from the badge she had handed him and sticking it to his shirt, she knew his name, he might as well learn hers. His eyes moved to the small name tag on her shirt, “Thank you, Annie Leonhardt. By the way, if you guys have any better pillows, send them Marco’s way, his are shit.” He gave her a wink and headed down the hallway towards Marco’s room. Another guest? Who could that possibly be.

Jean arrived at Marco’s room and peaked through the window in the door curiously. What he saw inside made his heart skip a beat or two. Inside the room, sat on the edge of Marco’s bed was a little girl. From what Jean could see, Marco was chatting rather animatedly with the little girl, a bright smile on his face. Her hair was dark and was pulled back in a braid, the same shade as Marco’s and Jean could just make out the freckles on her olive skin, just like Marco, too. Jean backed up slowly, the girl was young enough to be Marco’s daughter for sure, and it suddenly dawned on him just how little he knew about the man on the other side of the door. He knew virtually nothing, and a wave of guilt rushed through him again, regardless of the ground he had made with Marco yesterday.

He didn’t want to interrupt...he couldn’t interrupt, not if that was his child. What was he in relation to her? He had no right at all.

Jean turned on his heel and made his way down the hall, the wrong way from the exit. Maybe he could wait, maybe she would leave, maybe her mother...Marco’s wife? would come pick her up. The thought made Jean feel sick. This should have been one of the first things to cross his mind. Marco’s family, Marco’s life. The life Jean had interrupted.

Making his way out of the hallway, he turned the corner and headed towards a balcony area located on the side of the hospital. He had hoped to spend a bit of time with Marco here today, but being alone suited him much better at the moment. He had seen people wheeling their patients outside for some sun and figured Marco might have enjoyed it, but Jean just couldn’t bring himself to interrupt the time Marco was spending with his daugher.  It was relatively empty at the moment, most patients probably either tucking into their lunch or preoccupied with their visitors.

It wasn’t long until someone walked up next to Jean, leaning up against the balcony rail and looking out into the distance. Jean turned his head, trying to get a better look at his company. He was surprised to see that the man was quite short, his jet black hair buzzed in the back and  lips pressed around a cigarette. He was wearing a set of blue scrubs, leading Jean to question why he was smoking. Smoking was prohibited on all balconies and surely the staff was no exception. “You sure you should be doing that buddy?”

The man didn’t even blink, taking a drag out of his cigarette and blowing the smoke over the railing, he reached out towards Jean, cigarette between his fingers, and tapped it, cinder and ash falling towards Jean’s feet. The blonde stepped back quickly, “What the fuck?”

“Careful now, wouldn’t want to fall over.” The mans eyes flicked to the pavement below, “I don’t think there would be much we could do for you if you did, buddy.” He took another drag, blowing the smoke towards Jean.

The blonde fanned the smoke away with his hand and took a few more steps away, “Gross. You really work here?”

“Nope, I just wear these for the hell of it.” He said, tugging at his scrubs, “I’ve been working here since before your balls dropped, kid.”

“I’m not a kid, thanks, but you still shouldn’t be smoking. There are patients out here.”

The man looked around, eyes slowly scanning the balcony, “There are? You sure? I just see an annoying asswipe kid that can’t mind his own business.”

Jean frowned and looked around, disappointed to find them alone, where the fuck had everyone gone. “Yeah well, whatever, that shit’s bad for you. You could...you know, start a fire. or something.” He mentally face palmed, way to go Jean. You’re really schooling this guy.

“What the fuck are you even doing up here anyway? You’re not with a patient, you one of those sicko’s that likes to do it with dead bodies? Gross.”

“Huh!? What? No what the fuck.”

The man smirked, taking a final drag of his cigarette and throwing it to the ground, putting it out completely by mashing it into the ground with his foot. Jean seriously wondered how someone so small could be so incredibly intimidating.

“I’m kidding, lighten up some yeah? You need to. Here. .” He offered Jean his hand, now free after the disposal of his cigarette.

He shook the man’s hand firmly, guy had one heck of a grip.

”I’m here to see someone, but they’re a little busy.”

“Busy being sick or busy with someone else? Big difference, one you can help, and one you can’t.”

Jean paused for a moment, “Someone else but...I really can’t help this. I shouldn’t interrupt the time with the person I think he’s with.”

“Bullshit. Even if you don’t stay for long, I’ve spent enough time around here to know how precious time is. No matter who you spend it with.” Jean looked at the man a bit apprehensively, “Look kid, I don’t know you, and you’re an annoying little shit. But I can tell you’re down about something, and let me tell you…If I got a dollar for every time I saw someone sulking around here with a face like yours, I’d be richer than all the surgeons and doctors here put together. This place sucks, it’s where miracles and curses happen simultaneously. You have to take the happiness you can find, even if you have to take it by force. You could be a miracle to someone, or a curse, you just don’t know, but you won’t be anything to them at all if you don’t get your ass to their room and do what you came here to do. Right?”

Jean’s eyes went a bit wide.

“Does this person mean something to you?”

The blonde nodded slowly, unable to take his eyes off of the smaller man.

“Then there’s your answer. I have to get back to work, I’ll be out here in about an hour for another smoke break. If I see your sorry ass out here, you’ll be mush on that pavement below.” The dark-haired man smiled again, looking up at Jean, “Got it?”

Jean nodded once more, taking a second to comprehend everything that was just said. His company turned away and headed to the door back inside, “Wait, what’s your name? Just..in case I’m still here. I’d like to know the name of the man that’s going to kill me”

The man stopped, turning back around to face Jean with a gleam in his eyes before he stepped inside. “Levi.”

 

\----

 

It hadn’t been long before Molly’s stomach had grumbled loudly. Marco rubbed her back, trust his stupid parents not to feed her and leave her completely in the care of their hospitalized. He paged Petra, something he hated doing. He knew the nurse had a plethora of patients to deal with and didn’t need to be messing around with his issues like this, but it was for Molly, and he knew deep down Petra wouldn’t mind.

The nurse popped her head in the door, face lighting up at the sight of the little girl next to Marco, “Well hello there, You’re..?”

“My sister, Molly. This is Nurse Petra, she’s been taking very good care of me.” Molly smiled and waved  a bit bashfully. She was loud and rambunctious around those she knew well, but in front of strangers she could be quite shy and quiet. “I’m sorry for bugging you Petra, I’m sure you’re busy but, Molly’s hungry and she’s sort of stuck here with me.”

The nurse smiled warmly, walking over to the two occupants of the bed, and offering Molly her hand to shake. The little girl took her hand and smiled up at her fondly, “Molly, would you like to come to the cafeteria with me?” She nodded, looking over at Marco for approval.

“Stay close to Nurse Petra, okay Molly? She’ll get you some food and bring you back to me.” Molly nodded in understanding, keeping hold on Petra’s hand. Together, they walked down the hallway hand in hand, Petra leading the way to the cafeteria. It had been a busy day at the hospital and she really needed to get back to work, but Petra was fond of Marco and didn’t want his little sister to go hungry. It wasn’t until they were almost at the cafeteria that a scream was heard down the hall, snapping Petra to attention. Another nurse rushed down the hallway towards them,

“We’ve got an agitated patient in room 1005, we need help restraining him.” Petra looked at the nurse and back to Molly, who was visibly a bit shaken by the screams from down the hall, “Molly, you stay right here okay? I have to go take care of something but I’ll be right back. Stay put, don’t leave.” The young girl looked up at Petra with wide eyes and nodded, watching her guardian rush down the hallway towards the increasingly-loud screams.

Commotion could be heard in the distance, and Molly couldn’t help but back up down the hallway, fear controlling her movements. She was afraid, and now alone and she knew she couldn’t get back to her brother’s room on her own. She wasn’t looking at all towards where she was going and found herself walking backward into someone’s legs. The contact quickly awakening  her from her initial fear.

With eyes like saucers, she looked up at the person whose space she had just invaded. A man, her brother’s age from what she could tell, with light brown eyes and rather fluffy two-toned hair. He peered down at her, a look of shock on his face.

The man opened his mouth to speak, his expression giving his surprise away. She turned to run away but he gently reached down to touch her shoulder, “ Wait...You’re Marco’s…Dau-”

“Marco?” She smiled up at the man, any friend of her brother’s was a friend of hers and maybe he could help her. She beamed proudly, screams and fear forgotten. “I’m Molly. Marco’s little sister!”

 

 


End file.
